Changing Your Perspective - Healing Through Awareness
It’s amazing what can happen when we choose to look at a situation, a person or an issue from a different perspective.
Here’s an example: You’re driving home from work. You notice here is a car that is speeding and whipping in and out of lanes. Your first thought is “what a jerk, some people just have no patience and are idiots.”
Now, let’s look at this person’s actions from a different perspective.
- Maybe they have to go to the bathroom and are trying to get to a place to stop before they potty in their pants.
- What if they are late to work and was told if they are late one more time, they will lose their job.
- Could they be rushing home to a scared or sick child.
- It could be that they're on the way to the emergency room with a sick person in the car.
Now, when you look at this same situation from four other points of view, doesn’t it change how you feel about the person in the car? I’m sure at least one of these examples causes you to feel differently.
This same principle can be applied to every other area of your life.............
When you start to look at situations, people, and issues from different perspectives, you can transform a really crappy thing in to something that isn’t so crappy.
Here’s another example using a relationship. Your significant other is in a really cranky mood and is being short with you. Your mind starts to make up reasons as to why he/she isn’t wanting to have a conversation with you. So your mind runs amuck and:
- You think he/she may be mad at you.
- He/she doesn’t want to be with you any longer.
- You must have done something wrong.
BUT, after all that imagining the worst case scenario, you find out that the reason he/she is so short with you is because they are feeling incredibly overwhelmed because of their to do list. They're getting anxious and nervous about having to have so much to accomplish and the only reason they are short with you is because they are trying to process all the things that they have to get done. It had nothing to do with you at all.
So, can you see how this makes you feel when you imagine that you’re the reason they are short? You feel crappy, unloved and become cranky and pissy with your significant other. This is how so many good relationships can go bad. Can you see how this can be a perpetual cycle?
When you find out what the real reason they are being short, you feel empathy and want to do what you can to help them. See how incredibly different you feel in these two same but different situations?
This is how changing your perspective can help you heal and have a happier life. You will be amazed at what it will do for your relationships if you just take the time to really understand what is going on with the other person. This isn’t just about intimate relationships either. I see this time and time again with family members, friends, and co-workers. So the next time you have a situation, sit back and consider what other perspectives you could use to view the situation. Sometimes it is exactly as your perceive it, but I bet you’ll find many more times that it wasn’t at all what you perceived it to be initially.